I spent the Jubilee weekend on a boat (I’m on a boat!) with 11 of my favourite people (it was a squash), terrorising the Norfolk Broads dressed as pirates.
It was awesome.
My friend Stuart once said “The trouble with driving a boat, is that if you’re driving a car and something goes wrong, you think ‘Gah, I’m going to crash!’ CRASH, but if you’re driving a boat, you think ‘Gah! I’m going to crash! … In a minute!’ … CRASH
Luckily I did not crash, and aside from a few minor bumps here and there and a few ducks being run down (they see the boat and SWIM RIGHT FOR IT, so who’s fault’s that?) there was no harm done, unless you count Ellen’s hangover the morning after the Apprentice final drinking game.
I could go on at length about how much fun we had, but as I wrote down a few quotes of the weekend that tickled me, I thought I’d just let them speak for themselves:
Lisa – “If this is the River Ant, is that one the River Dec?”
Nat – “Can you believe it’s only 9.30am and we’ve been up for ages?”
Manda – “Is it really? … I’m getting a beer.”
Nat – “Amanda! … Get me one too.”
Stew – “Lisa, when you are driving the boat, please don’t say ‘crap crap crap’.”
Ellen – “I’m getting really good at counting to twelve.”
In conclusion, boating is ace, so long as you’re surrounding by awesome friends and suicidal ducks.